Fault Lines

Original Post: June 26, 2007

I laugh when you say you know me so well - I am a mystery to myself. Full of love, jaded beyond words. Funny, caustic. Caring and cold. Open book - walled heart. I am a walking disaster...waiting for you to build your house on the shaky ground that is my life. I don't laugh at your jokes-I laugh that you think you are making me warm to you. You think I am running to you with open arms and a wide smile but it is only those that come and lay on the floor beside me and taste the river that is my tears and feel the floor shake that will ever understand...they are my friends...they are my family...they love me, they hate me, they know me - better than I know myself. They know when my laughter is a sob when my smile is a knife...they see me walking into fire and try to pull me out...it is in the trying that I love them. It is in my failing that I know they still love me. I am a walking earthquake. My friends are the sturdy doorframes of my life...